Two days ago, I attended a BIG (meaning many people attended) birthday party on a Friday night where I met people in entertainment, and then yesterday, Sat, I auditioned for a group that helps young new talent get in front of movers and shakers in the industry.

Looking at Sat first: After my acting and singing audition I was told I should be acting all the time, but since I’m neither young nor new there wasn’t a place for me in their group.

I’m what they gently referred to as “seasoned”.

That makes me think of a great cut of steak, but I digress.

Should I in fact be acting all the time?

I’d certainly like to be.

The Sat. event I attended for the group costs a lot of money, but they are training-often from scratch- people who want to be in the industry and the group is very well attached in Hollywood.

So it seems to be a worthwhile investment in a career.

I’d love someone to take my “seasoned” hand and help me makes the contacts that would help me!

But they agree with me, I shouldn’t pay for training and workshops I could probably teach.

So, they’re discussing the possibility of creating a professionals pkg. for people like me, but I don’t know how the scenario will play out.

Still they have a history of success, I’d love for there to be a way for people like me to work with them, but that is not today.

Which brings me to the BIG BIRTHDAY PARTY.

There I met a caterer who graduated from Emerson College, the same year I left BCM.

That was fun to rehash 1980s Beantown.

I met a Director who said he was doing projects where he is frequently looking for someone like me, a seasoned, but not star name, actress.

I met a Novelist whom I enjoyed chatting with for a long while and he introduced me to an executive producer looking for projects to invest in.

Which I have, and my friends do.

Who knows, perhaps there will be a role for me.

I also met a director whom I was able to steer to a film festival he could enter, where the prize is 1M to make a feature.

And I met a frustrated animator, who’s willing to work for nothing on a short another friend of mine is producing, just because he wants to use his talents.

So all in all, I got leads and I helped other people with leads.

As long as we all follow up and follow through, there’s value in that as well.

I don’t HAVE to be jealous of those new people getting a chance at an easier path than I’ve had with the group.

I don’t have to be, and today, if I am, it’s buried deep enough I don’t recognize it.

When I was young and new, I would’ve LOVED the opportunities that group offers.

I don’t want to be a person who’d deny someone else that chance to succeed.

And I don’t.

I just want to be working all the time too.

Not in place of– also.

The truth is, as much as I love the work of acting and directing, and I really, really do, it’d be easy for me to let it overwhelm my relationships with my family.

I need to look out for them as well.

The industry eats up relationships and spits them out daily.

We read it in all the papers, magazines, see it on the TV shows.

It’s much harder work in Film and TV than most people think.

They are two similar though very different foreign countries.

They have similar speech, but very different accents, different word usage, customs, and traditions.

It’s often hard to know how to handle yourself in situations so you don’t embarrass yourself or others.

This can be very stressful to anyone working among these people groups.

I don’t want my family going the way of so many others.

It’s called balance.

Balance is achieved through constant motion.

Shifting your weight front, back, sideways all the time.

It’s hard work.

I love it.

I hope, since I’m continuing, when all is said and done, my family and I all think it was worth it.